3/23/24 i cried because i knew what i had lost. life is hard without love and it seems in this life it's sparse. i know it won't be easy to let go of the little bit that i have now when i'm ready to move out and hopefully i won't have to. i don't like what waits for me out there. it's ever changing and angry. it masticates everything and spits it onto a hot sidewalk when it's flavor fades.
3/23/24 there's a rage about a god who demands your loyalty.
for this god, spires and crucifixes shoot from the earth and into the sky.
this god is the driving force of all things.
those who are without him are lost. those who deny him are damned.
this god created you in his image yet he is the personification of perfection in all aspects of the word.
you are the opposite.
blood drips from his very name.
this god brings us up only to drive us into the ground with naught but an engraved slab jutting from the ground to commemorate us.
sometimes not even that.
we walk dark paths and to do so without pledging your loyalty to him is punishable by hellfire because he loves you.
he loves you.
12/22/23
a young man lived by himself in a small house just outside of town. he was new there so not much was known about him as he kept a private life but remained kind to others. as time went on, he slowly began to act very strangely and his coworkers began to take notice after he suddenly ran out of the building, jumped in his car and sped home before his shift had even ended. they had reported that heโd been staring out the back window of the building for minutes on end as if he saw something there before quickly leaving. he then stopped showing up to work for over a week and was not answering his bossโs calls. police were dispatched to his home address in hopes of finding out whatโs going on, but when they arrived the house was gone and his car was parked in the driveway with an empty tank. nothing but the concrete foundation of the home was left. police were confused and assumed they had the wrong address but that was the only address on the manโs file. during a survey of the area, the men found a cardboard box tucked under a tree with the words โWhat I know Iโll never haveโ written on the top. inside were six tapes each were stacked neatly inside the small box. upon inspection, the fingerprints they found could not be traced in their database. it was as if the mans file had somehow been deleted. they popped the tapes into a cassette player and began listening. the next morning the custodian of the building was headed into work for her shift but when she pulled into the parking lot she saw that the entire police station had vanished, leaving only its foundation in tact. sure enough, the box of tapes sat at the center, seemingly untouched. missing persons reports were then quickly filed for the staff whose last known locations were inside of the building.
